Broken and Put Back Together....Only Better This Time

When you were younger, did ever fantasize about your first boyfriend or girlfriend? You'd see couples and think "I want that one day." Well that day came crashing down on me like a ton of bricks. I never had any serious love interests until I met my first boyfriend. Though we didn't know each other for long, we started dating a measly three weeks after we first met. This may be a big flahsing red light to some people, but I wanted to see where the relationship would go. From the beginning, it was clear that he had the stronger feelings for me, but that just me feel all the more special. Now, as some may assume, our relationship wasn't perfect. In fact, the first five months were the rockiest, but we survived them. This gave me faith that our relationship could endure anything. After the rocky times, we got on the right track. We went on dates, we went to the pool in the hot summer, watched movies in my basement together, and even met each others' families. We were the perfect couple, as some called us. The one memory that we shared that I will never forget was when we went to my first homecoming together. Going to dances was never on my priority list, but this meant a lot to me. The night was beyond perfect and I felt like a princess who had her prince. I felt like I finally had it all.........

One month later, my world came crashing down. I felt like someone had literally ripped my soul out of my body. I expected him to be there for me, because I would do the same for him. But, out of nowhere he ended. It was over. We were over. I felt numb, like I was drowing in the sea and couldn't swim back up to the surface. I was running out of air and I couldn't see anything. Suddenly, I saw it. I saw my new life, without him. I was mad at him for flushing 13 months down the toilet. All I wanted was him, but I knew I couldn't have him. People were telling me that I was better off without him, but I couldn't see it that way. I felt like I was alone in the world, like I had no one I could talk to.I missed his face, his laugh, his smile, his touch. He was my first boyfriend, my first kiss, and my first love. How could someone do this to me? I didn't make sense, but I tried to keep my mind off of what had happened. Then I started going to Youth group. The first time I went, I didn't really want to go. I only agreed to go so I could make one of my friends happy. When I got there, I didn't understand what was happening. There were people my age praising God like the amazing savior that he is; this I didn't understand. How had these people who were so young be willing to give up their time to come church and praise God? Although I didn't comprehend the purpose, I kept going back. While going back, I began to realize something: everyone there had their own reason for being there, but they all had one thing in common. And that was to communicate with their Heavenly Father.

Through all of this, I have learned a great deal about God and myself. Before all I thought about was school, my family, a few friend, and my boyfriend. I didn't know much about God or why Christians spend so much time praising him. Going to Youth has surrounded me with people that have made me so much stronger. My strength comes from within myself. That strength comes from my Savior who has given me everything. Now, I don't care if I have a boyfriend or not and I try to be the best person I can be. I go to Youth every Friday night and everyday I look up to the sky and say "It's all because of You, that I am here. You're Beautiful."